Who Am I?
by oh.sweet.sarcasm
Summary: Malfoy takes advice from Zabini to find the perfect girl. Zabini got the idea from a book he read in the library. The question is, was he the only one who read that book? DMHG. oneshot


A/N: Okay! Hey guys :D It's me! (duh) Well the plot for this fic came to me while my sister was showing me her grades (I swear, the plot for this has no relation with what she showed me, whatsoever) And, I did want to write my first non-drabble oneshot :)) So, here you go, a very, very terrible Dramione fic :D Please read and review!

Disclaimer: I own nothing HP related in this fic! Dangit…

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**Who Am I?**

"You need a girl" Zabini said plainly was I was doing my Transfiguration homework, minding my own business.

"_What?_" I answered, trying to sound outraged. Why the bloody hell do I keep doing that? Ah, oh well.

"You need a girl." He repeated

"What makes you say that?" I finally put down my book, showing that I was now fully concentrated. "Oh please, Zabini. I'm not _that_ pathetic." He raised an eyebrow. "Oh fine. _Fine!" _I never knew what was with him, but he always managed to get the truth out of me. Well either that or he just made me abnormally open.

"Dya have anyone in mind?" I asked, uncertainly.

"Well of course not."

"And how do you expect me to get a girl then?" I chuckled, "With my usual charm, I s'pose? With my-"

"Let's start with teaching you how to keep your feet _on the ground._ Manners, you know? Take out your rudeness…"

"Who the hell are you and what have you down with Blaise Zabini? Thank you."

"Oh _ha-ha_, very funny, Malfoy; and c'mon, I was only kidding with the manners. Of course, being my awesome self, I have prepared and constructed a plan" A smirk appeared on his face, causing _me_ to raise an eyebrow. "Talk."

"Well, I found this book in the library…" He began.

"You go to the library?" I suddenly interrupted.

"Sometimes," He looked ashamed, "But that's beyond the point."

"Okay, well, c'mon then! C'mon!"

"Yeah, so the main character in the story got his girl by just asking random girls one question." He paused for a moment, then continued, "Who am I?" _I burst out laughing._

"You must be kidding me" I said, still laughing.

"What? It could work!" He protested. I hesitated for a while but soon agreed. What've I got to lose? Doesn't mean I'd get less good-looking right?

"Okay, so, what does she have to answer for me to know that she's the one?" I asked

"That, mate…" He smiled, or was it a smirk? "…is up to you."

I thought for a long while what I'd want a girl to answer if I asked "Who am I?" Possibly the most devilishly handsome wizard ever known? _No, no. _The only man who resembled to a god, physically? _No, no. _Finally, something struck me. I knew the answer I've been looking for.

The next day, I went to Zabini and told him what I've decided my answer to be. He looked, in my opinion, unusually delighted with what I've thought of. I just shook of the observation and began asking random girls I passed by the question; starting with Slytherin.

"Hey, Parkinson! Oi!"

"Yes, Draco?" The tone of her voice always _did_ creep me out. I took a deep breath…

"Who am I?" She looked rather confused but answered.

"The most devilishly handsome wizard ever known, of course!" She answered in one breath. Okay, now _that_ was creepy.

"Er, yeah, okay. See you around, Parkinson." I ran off without waiting for what she said to take over my whole mission. After a couple more Slytherins, I proceeded to Hufflepuff. There weren't many Hufflepuff girls in the corridors and I never did know why, so I put them on hold for Ravenclaws first. Almost immediately, I saw a familiar Ravenclaw girl and approached her. She wasn't as pretty as I wanted my girl to be, but it was worth a shot.

"Hey." I greeted.

"Uhm, hello." She looked kind of uncomfortable. Meh, maybe my good looks were distracting her.

"Who am I?"

"Er, Draco Malfoy?" _Wow, that was a bloody shock._

"Okay then." With that, I took off. Okay, now, Hufflepuff. I was thinking about all the Hufflepuff girls I knew, when Abbott suddenly passed by.

"Abbott?" I called

"Yeah?" Why did they all look and sound so uncomfortable when I talk to them? Am I just _that_ handsome?

"Who am I" Wow, I was getting the hang of this.

"Well," She giggled, "I hear you're sometimes a git."

"Whatthe-?!" I had to stop myself from continuing my sentence since I _was_ in a hurry. Soon, Abbott, _soon._ "Nevermind, bye." Okay, well this was getting exhausting. I decided to take a break and have a quick read in the library. _Yes, _I _do_ read. It's something most people don't know about me, and I don't plan to let anyone know, either. (Obliviate!) I walked in as quietly as I could, causing as little attention as possible and went to a hidden part in the back, where I usually read. I decided to try to find the book Zabini was talking about, so I went out of my spot again and rummaged through some bookshelves. "The title's probably 'Who Am I?' or something." I whispered to myself. Suddenly, saw someone who I wasn't really surprised to see. I mean, she _was_ a bookworm know-it-all.

"Mudblood"

"Hello, ferret." She retorted. "What are _you_ doing here? Shouldn't you be bullying a first year or something?" She added, without once looking up from her book.

"Yeah, but I decided to do something else today." She finally looked up and raised an eyebrow.

"Well as long as you don't get in my way-" She left her book on her table and walked away.

Wait a minute, Granger's a Gryffindor, I couldn't deny that she _was_ kinda pretty, even though she _was_ a Mudblood. Oh, mother will never forgive me for this…

"Granger, wait up!" I called semi-loudly. She stopped and turned around.

"What?" She mouthed. I caught up with her, panting, and finally asked,

"Who am I?"

"Well, that's up to you isn't it?" She answered in her know-it-all voice.

"Exactly." I smiled, possibly my first real one today. "Mind if I walk you to the Great Hall?" She smirked.

"Sure. Whatever."

"Okay, but wait just one second." I ran to her table, where she left the book she was reading to check if my suspicions were correct…

When I finally reached her table, I picked up the book and saw, in big letters, "Who Am I?" _Knew it. _I gave a small laugh and went back to where I left Granger.

"Shall we?"


End file.
